As you may know I am one of the proud same sex parents of a little boy and a little girl whom my partner and I adopted.
Let me tell you something about that process. It took us roughly a year and a half , around 20 home visits, a 78 page application detailing EVERYTHING about us. And I mean everything right down to sexual history to how we felt our parents cared for us, childhood memories and everything in between.
Our family and friends were interviewed. Our employers questioned and we had to prove that we were capable of providing for and caring for our children through experience and provision of evidence.
We stood in front of a panel of 16 people and were further questioned. Eventually we were allowed to become “approved adopters”.
It all sounds a bit harsh doesn’t it? Well it is but it’s also fair. It’s the right and proper thing to do as those very same people have to prove due diligence as they are entrusting the care of children to us.
Eventually we get matched to the children, there’s the hard match which is according to a questionnaire and a soft match where the social workers themselves form an opinion on your particular fit to the various children available. This takes time and it took a few months for that to happen with many people involved in that decision making process. Our job was to wait.
Then the children get placed, we had a long introductory period where we worked with the foster parents, their social worker, our social worker and the children’s social worker. Eventually the children were placed with us. The visits continue to check on how you are all doing. A year later we are in court and the judge proclaims us a family. All of this happens whether you are homo, bi, trans or hetero adopters. It’s the same because sexuality and gender identity DO NOT MATTER.
Then David Jones MP comes along and is quoted as saying in regard to the Marriage (same sex) Bill on the ITV Face to Face program:
“I was one of two cabinet ministers who did vote against it and it was for various reasons. Certainly in constituency terms, I felt that overwhelmingly the constituents of Clwyd West were opposed to the change. But also I regard marriage as an institution that has developed over many centuries, essentially for the provision of a warm and safe environment for the upbringing of children, which is clearly something that two same-sex partners can’t do. Which is not to say that I’m in any sense opposed to stable and committed same-sex partnerships.”
With that offensive, derogatory and inaccurate statement I feel completely devalued as a parent and as a citizen of this country. I feel my partner and I and the many people who go through the adoption and fostering application process are actually qualified to be parents. We have had many comments on the massive progress the children have made since being with us. They have gone from deprived, abused, unhappy children to buoyant, thriving, happy and intelligent children under our care. This is because they are in a warm and safe environment, at odds to his claims. Indeed there is no evidence to support his claims that I’m aware of.
David Jones MP’s statement is a controversial assertion given that many adoption and foster agencies are actively seeking LGBT families and have planned LGBT Adoption & Fostering Week supported by the BAAF Chief Executive. This is an annual event and has been extremely successful in it’s aim of introducing LGBT to adoption and fostering agencies.
New Family Social has challenged the controversial statements made by David Jones MP
However NFS is not the only one to challenge him.
Chris Bryant MP has tweeted:
Sadly, we’ll all have to wait for a response from David Jones MP on Twitter as he’s given it up for Lent.